The first of May is upon us already, my friends! Sometimes I think back to two years ago with the first of May signifying about 2 weeks until the GCSE exams and it feels like a lifetime ago that I was worrying about that. Equally though, it feels like college has flown by unbelievably quickly and it’s almost over too!

So I have been very unproductive today but I am going to say it is justified as I’m so tired.

Actually before I talk about my day, I have to share the big news: the French speaking exams this week are cancelled! I sincerely hope our examiner is okay but it is a bit of a relief knowing the real exam isn’t on Thursday. I know a lot of people were disappointed as they were totally prepared for this to be over and done with, but we all found out early this morning, mere minutes before she was due to have her meeting with the students that she had had an accident.

I am sure I will grow to realise that this short term satisfaction wasn’t worth it when the exam is rescheduled to a time during Ramadan and it’s significantly harder as it’ll also be closer to exams. In reality, I think I would have been sufficiently prepared for my exam on Thursday so I guess it is an overall loss, but hopefully she is okay and things run smoothly next time.

Okay, back to my day. I had a nap when I came home and I wasted a lot of time procrastinating too, but despite that, I have almost finished my Populations notes for biology. I’m feeling good about the status of my biology revision right now as I know I can finish them relatively quickly and I aim to do that before Friday’s lesson, and then hopefully I can get the last topic of component 1, Human Impact, done over the weekend. In terms of keeping positive, I am still trying my best and going relatively strong with my attitude.

I’ve not done anything besides biology today which is good because I’ve gotten important work done but also a bit bad because I feel like I’m falling behind in my other subjects.

Something interesting I’d like to share from today, though, is a diagram that our tutor showed us relating to the phases you go through during your A-Level study.

I will be honest, I think this is a pretty accurate representation of the stages that I’ve certainly gone through and you can see the cross on the diagram showing where I think I’m at right now. I am ready to suck it up and move on now, acknowledge my mistakes wholeheartedly and go about fixing them in any way possible. The curve is modelled on the grieving process which is an interesting comparison that has been drawn, and I think it’s a bit funny that study at this level has been compared to dealing with bereavement, as I can imagine there is a very serious difference between the two and it almost makes me sad to think that this is the importance and pressure placed on these exams.

My study goals for tomorrow are:
– Work through the Bronze paper 2 for C3 in my frees tomorrow
– Finish the Bronze paper when I get home and mark/correct it
– Make some notes on chemistry topics that I haven’t got good notes for (topics from the middle of this year where I lost motivation and kind of resorted to odd, messy notes here and there)

That’s all I intend on focusing on because I know I will barely even get that done well.

Also, upon reflecting on my life earlier today, I want to express that I am extremely grateful for the wonderful friends I have who support me with all their hearts and have nothing but love for me and others. These are the people I want to be like and they inspire me to be a better person and I think that’s the sign of a great friend. I have always said that I’m my own number one fan and that it’s important to appreciate solitude, but on the same level, it is so essential to appreciate the love and constant encouragement you get from those that surround you and want the best for you.

I will head off to sleep now because I’d like to get to college a little earlier tomorrow morning so I can get some revision done. That’s it from me, hope you are doing well and you’re out there hustling hard to make all your dreams come true. Much love!

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